I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
