Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
