I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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