Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Randomize
