So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
FUCK WHALES
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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