I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
