Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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