If i come over, it means nothing
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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