it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
