dude i'm inner monologue high
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
