I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
