David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
