Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Randomize
