Where did you get a picture of my penis
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
