Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
