Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
