My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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