I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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