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• (301): View more from Maryland

  we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing

  (1-301): View more from Maryland

  that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome

  (301): View more from Maryland

  we agree. completely

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him

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• (818): View more from California

  The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...

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• (352): View more from Florida

  Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know

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• (386): View more from Florida

  well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.

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• (805): View more from California

  The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.

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• (561): View more from Florida

  I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway

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