Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
