i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
