And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
