I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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