real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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