He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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