I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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