YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
