Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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