why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
