I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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