Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
