Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
