big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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