i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
