I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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