Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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