end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
