I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
