I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
