So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
