I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize