Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
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