i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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