He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
