Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize