your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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