Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I don't deserve a penis
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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