i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I need to align my fucking chakras
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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