It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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