So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
